Automobile

What If Every Big Tech Company Got Into The Car-Making Business?

And now, it’s time for something completely different. But here’s the thing: is an idea as wacky as cars made by big tech companies really that different? We know Apple has long talked about introducing its own car. And lest we forget the Sony Vision S concept that surprised us all in early 2020 by looking extremely production-ready. Are you afraid now?

Don’t be. Vanarama sent us this curious group of fictional renderings purely for the sake of imagining a goofy future and let’s face it – we could all benefit from being a bit goofy right now. So with that in mind, suspend your disbelief if only for a minute or two, and imagine yourself riding in one of these strange tech-sourced autonomous machines. Some might be more fun than others. Heck, there’s one we wouldn’t mind spending time in right now. 

Zoom MeetUp

For the record, this isn’t the tech car we want to spend time in. Yes, 2020 redefined the world of remote face-to-face communications, but it also revealed just how many people like to sit around the house in their underwear. As such, can you imagine the people in this mobile Zoom car inadvertently picking their nose or passively-aggressively road-raging at other cars during a meeting? If you’ve been unfortunate enough to partake in a Zoom meeting where at least one person forgot the camera was running, you know how bad an idea this car is.

Amazon Prime Max

Amazon

Amazon already offers all kinds of stuff, so why not a car, or in this case, a van? Vanarama’s description says it comes with its own fleet of drones, which actually has us thinking about commercial applications for this idea. There’s space inside for tools and materials, and drones could do everything from bringing those items to contractors, to surveying and possibly even conducting work in hard-to-reach areas. Honestly, of all the weird ideas here, this is the one that actually makes sense for the real world.

Apple iDrive

Apple

Whereas the Amazon van is the most practical on this list, Apple’s car is the one most likely to actually see production. It won’t necessarily look like this – nobody knows what it might look like – but if it’s an Apple product we can surmise a few things about it. For starters, it should be stylish and packed with tech but also be supremely expensive. Expect some neat features but also an exclusion of common-sense items like cupholders. Actually, it would have cupholders, but they’ll be square instead of round… a perfect fit for the $150 set of Apple iCups available at your nearest Apple store.

Netflix CineMove

Netflix

Let’s be honest. The CineMove already exists. No, it’s not the rectangular gull-winged machine depicted here, which looks surprisingly similar to those full-motion VR rides found in shopping mall eateries all over America. The aftermarket is already full of custom machines packed with mobile sound and video gear, though this one literally replaces the front windshield with a TV screen. Come to think of it, how cool would it be to watch Marty McFly hit 88 mph in Doc Brown’s DeLorean while actually going 88 mph? If that ever happens, you’re going to see some serious shit.

Peloton CommuCycle

Peloton

Here’s the tech-sourced vehicle for those who obsess about going to the gym but just don’t have time. Presumably, the exercise bike in the autonomous EV wouldn’t just be a workout before work, but also help charge the batteries. It might be neat in theory, but unless there’s a shower in there somewhere, forget about anyone showing up to the office in a fog of sweaty body odor. This one is definitely a fail.

Airbnb Serenity Shuttle

Airbnb

This one isn’t a fail. It’s a win. A major win, in fact, and the one we want right now. And why not? It’s simply an autonomous evolution of #Vanlife which, for the past several years, has enjoyed a tremendous global resurgence. This rideshare service doesn’t just take you in comfort to your relaxing destination. It is your relaxing destination, but with the added bonus of being a destination constantly on the move. Is it really a destination, then? Who knows. We just know we want it.

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